It seems as though young women in New York have two choices for men. We can have the man that is so consumed with his career that he doesn't have time to emotionally involve himself in his extracurricular affairs. He is set on a goal, but unfortunately you are not it. He has a precise idea as to where he wants to be in his career, yet he has no idea what he wants from the women he dates. He may try to make you feel like you are the only one he is interested in, but that will not last. That phase for this man lasts as long as the milk in one's fridge. It is the epitome of sexy and exciting, but the woman knows in the back of her mind it will not last. However, it is thrilling because it's like a high from a drug. It is fleeting, as this man will realize he doesn't have the emotional threshold to last in this stage with a woman for more than a couple months. Maybe three, if you are lucky. Why we keep picking these men can not be explained. It may be our unconscious way of getting into something that will clearly not go anywhere, so we veer from becoming too emotionally attached, on a real adult level. One can be in lust or really like and care for a man, but if we do not both dive into something in such a genuine and mature way, than we are bound to not get as hurt as we would otherwise.
To have the simple man, who is soaked in availability and reliability, is a very different experience. The woman that seeks this man doesn't want to play games, and in turn doesn't want a challenge as well. The challenge part of dating is what makes our stomachs flips, our emotions to go crazy. Taking away the challenge, takes away the excitement. It is not exciting to have a man lay out all his cards for you from an early stage. What we question in this is, is if he is willing to be open and available like this with any woman. Women need to feel special, so that is why we go for the former (horrible) guys. No, that can't be why! It's because the career man, the man who has charisma and strength has this ability to make you feel so special and solely worthy of his attention, that is hard to pass up. It is fleeting though as the next great girl that comes along will get that same reception. It is simply passed off like a baton.
When one really thinks about this, it doesn't make too much sense. "I will go for the man who doesn't want to jump for me, but I will not go for the man who is willing to jump". The problem is, we don't say that sentence to ourselves while we're in it. I might be daring and propose we aren't analytical enough. Anyone who realizes a pattern of going for emotionally disengaged men and then in turn not being interested in the "relationship guy" is quite masochistic. Maybe it isn't analyzing; maybe it's just being coherent. It could almost suggest in a way these types of girls are commitment-phobes in their own. If a woman constantly goes for the wrong kind of guy, what can she expect? What does that say about her? To get out of this pattern is quite difficult. We can say the unavailable man needs to grow up and realize what's really important, but we could say the same thing for some women.
To have the simple man, who is soaked in availability and reliability, is a very different experience. The woman that seeks this man doesn't want to play games, and in turn doesn't want a challenge as well. The challenge part of dating is what makes our stomachs flips, our emotions to go crazy. Taking away the challenge, takes away the excitement. It is not exciting to have a man lay out all his cards for you from an early stage. What we question in this is, is if he is willing to be open and available like this with any woman. Women need to feel special, so that is why we go for the former (horrible) guys. No, that can't be why! It's because the career man, the man who has charisma and strength has this ability to make you feel so special and solely worthy of his attention, that is hard to pass up. It is fleeting though as the next great girl that comes along will get that same reception. It is simply passed off like a baton.
When one really thinks about this, it doesn't make too much sense. "I will go for the man who doesn't want to jump for me, but I will not go for the man who is willing to jump". The problem is, we don't say that sentence to ourselves while we're in it. I might be daring and propose we aren't analytical enough. Anyone who realizes a pattern of going for emotionally disengaged men and then in turn not being interested in the "relationship guy" is quite masochistic. Maybe it isn't analyzing; maybe it's just being coherent. It could almost suggest in a way these types of girls are commitment-phobes in their own. If a woman constantly goes for the wrong kind of guy, what can she expect? What does that say about her? To get out of this pattern is quite difficult. We can say the unavailable man needs to grow up and realize what's really important, but we could say the same thing for some women.
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